so, these two conversations happened this week.
1) Alacrity and Dr. Treaphine (an ER doctor), discussing a case:
Dr. T: "Hey, is that puppy going home now?"
A: "Yes! He's doing really well. He's gonna wait with his owner while I finish his discharges."
Dr. T: "Awesome! I'm glad to hear it. (glances around, drops voice) Hey, you know...his owner is this really cute guy [wink] - I think he might be married, though."
2) Alacrity and Dr. Nell (radiologist), during an ultrasound:
Dr. N: "Alacrity, you went to vet school at the University of Awesome?"
A: "Yup! It was fantastic."
Dr. N (ultrasounding the dog's abdomen): "Oh, wow - check out this mass. You're gonna make these owners cry. (pause) Huh. (pause) Yeah, I think this is cancer. You'll need to get some aspirates of this, but we'll need to check her clotting times first."
A: "That sucks. I'll go talk to them."
Dr. N: "Sounds good - let me just see if there's anything else in here. (ultrasounding) So, did your partner move here with you, or does she live somewhere else?"
learning!
1st year ECC resident (frantic): "Is Dr. Raeqe placing the chest tubes in that cat? Is she doing it now?"
3rd year ECC resident (glances over): "It would appear that she is."
1st year ECC resident: "Augghh! I told her to page me when she was starting! I will fight for this education!"
3rd year ECC resident (calmly): "You will fail."
3rd year ECC resident (glances over): "It would appear that she is."
1st year ECC resident: "Augghh! I told her to page me when she was starting! I will fight for this education!"
3rd year ECC resident (calmly): "You will fail."
fun times in rounds:
ECC resident: "His penis is the most horribly sad thing I've ever seen."
Internist: "I've met your husband, so coming from you that is saying something."
Internist: "I've met your husband, so coming from you that is saying something."
alacrity's internship:
Hi you guys!
I figure internship comics are awesome, so I'm going to give it a go.
Here's my comic representation of myself and my little cat, Pudgy:
Let the games begin!
and love rained down from the surgery lights:
The couple of days right after vet school graduation were kind of insane. I was simultaneously trying to pack everything, turning in various important forms, getting the utilities turned on/off in the correct apartments, and meeting up with my buddies before we all left town.
One afternoon, I stopped by the vet school on an errand and tarried a while to use the free wifi (fun fact! I never set up wifi in my last apartment. Mostly because it was expensive and I spent most of my not-at-home hours in spaces with free internet). I settled on a couch at the end of a long hallway connecting the small animal hospital with the large animal one. It's a cheerful space, with a steady but not distracting stream of passers-by.
The door next to me opened and Dr. Quin emerged. Dr. Quin is a large animal surgeon. He is a suave, sarcastic man who constantly carries a mug of coffee. His ego is larger than the condom supply at a gay bath house.
He has a habit of looking up at his student in the middle of surgery and saying,
"So! Do you have a boyfriend? Or a girlfriend?"
He will then proceed to dispense romantic advice to said student.
Now, this never happened to me. I scrubbed in on one surgery with Dr. Quin during that rotation, and we somehow missed the topic. We've talked maybe eight or ten times in total, and always about veterinary subjects.
Also, I'm quite femme in manner and dress. Many a new friend or classmate has been surprised to discover that I'm into the ladies.
So, Dr. Quin, through the door. I glanced up at him. He paused next to me, fist-pumped, and said,
"Twelve states now!"
Oh my goodness. You guys, I cried. And holy shit, the Quinster's ninja gaydar skills blew my mind.
One afternoon, I stopped by the vet school on an errand and tarried a while to use the free wifi (fun fact! I never set up wifi in my last apartment. Mostly because it was expensive and I spent most of my not-at-home hours in spaces with free internet). I settled on a couch at the end of a long hallway connecting the small animal hospital with the large animal one. It's a cheerful space, with a steady but not distracting stream of passers-by.
The door next to me opened and Dr. Quin emerged. Dr. Quin is a large animal surgeon. He is a suave, sarcastic man who constantly carries a mug of coffee. His ego is larger than the condom supply at a gay bath house.
He has a habit of looking up at his student in the middle of surgery and saying,
"So! Do you have a boyfriend? Or a girlfriend?"
He will then proceed to dispense romantic advice to said student.
Now, this never happened to me. I scrubbed in on one surgery with Dr. Quin during that rotation, and we somehow missed the topic. We've talked maybe eight or ten times in total, and always about veterinary subjects.
Also, I'm quite femme in manner and dress. Many a new friend or classmate has been surprised to discover that I'm into the ladies.
So, Dr. Quin, through the door. I glanced up at him. He paused next to me, fist-pumped, and said,
"Twelve states now!"
Oh my goodness. You guys, I cried. And holy shit, the Quinster's ninja gaydar skills blew my mind.
we're nerds:
You guys, cardiology was a fantastic rotation. The hours were reasonable, the chiefs were kind and gave unbelievably thorough rounds, and the patients were well-mannered. Also, it was really fun.
So, there is this cardiologist at the University of Awesome who describes the left atrium and left auricle on echocardiogram as Fudgie the Whale. He will then wink at the students and lament that no one has ever brought him a Fudgie the Whale Carvel cake.
Well, thanks to one guy on our cardiology rotation, he'll need to find a new punchline:
"Palpable Krill". Friends, vet folks are nerds. Unapologetic, fantastically epic nerds. Hooray!
So, there is this cardiologist at the University of Awesome who describes the left atrium and left auricle on echocardiogram as Fudgie the Whale. He will then wink at the students and lament that no one has ever brought him a Fudgie the Whale Carvel cake.
Well, thanks to one guy on our cardiology rotation, he'll need to find a new punchline:
"Palpable Krill". Friends, vet folks are nerds. Unapologetic, fantastically epic nerds. Hooray!
furrrrrniture:
My new state is a reasonable driving distance (a little over six hours) from the University of Awesome. So! Moving was simpler than it might have been otherwise. All of the stuff in my apartment fit into the back of a pickup truck and a car, even with the front seat reserved for a certain someone:
My cat is awesome, btw. I met her in a palpation lab at the vet school during my first year, and at the time she was as fat as a house. She weighed approximately twice what her trim body weight should be. She sat fatly in her metal cage sternly regarding the world around her. I scooped her up in my arms (my lab partner said, "Lift with your legs!") and I instantly loved her.
She has since lost a significant amount of poundage, and enjoys snarfing every morsel of food she can find. We share the same name (I did not name her, she came with it), so for a time the two technicians in charge of the labs called us "Alacrity" and "Fat Alacrity". As in,
"Hey Alacrity! How's Fat Alacrity doing?"
She is also an excellent traveler, and always very polite. Sometimes she bites.
Anyway!
This was supposed to be a post about furniture.
I didn't have all that much furniture in my last apartment, but in the spirit of minimalism and having fewer heavy things to carry whilst moving, I winnowed said furniture down to the following:
1. Futon and frame
2. Nightstand
3. Coffee table
4. Two folding shelves
5. Meditation bench
6. Two stools
7. Freestanding kitchen butcher-block structure
8. Fish tank stand
9. Three disassemble-able small shelves for shoes, etc.
10. Sturdy plastic storage container with drawers
Also (not furniture exactly but heavy, big, and/or fragile:
1. Full-length mirror
2. Two small lamps
3. One tall lamp
4. Toaster oven
Here are some things I learned about moving a) furniture, and b) things that are heavy, big, and/or fragile:
1. Take the lightbulbs out of your lamps.
2. Get a box designed to move art for your big mirror (or your art also), or really extensively/absurdly wrap the mirror in soft, comfy blankets.
3. TAKE PICTURES OF HOW THINGS GO TOGETHER BEFORE YOU TAKE THEM APART.
4. Put all the screws and washers in a bag together for each piece of furniture and label them.
5. Do not let cords dangle and trip you while you are carrying a corded appliance.
6. If you are moving something with drawers without emptying said drawers, tape the drawers shut.
Happy packing! Hopefully you will lose your screwdriver, hammer and scissors fewer times than I did.
 |
| ALWAYS WATCHING |
She has since lost a significant amount of poundage, and enjoys snarfing every morsel of food she can find. We share the same name (I did not name her, she came with it), so for a time the two technicians in charge of the labs called us "Alacrity" and "Fat Alacrity". As in,
"Hey Alacrity! How's Fat Alacrity doing?"
She is also an excellent traveler, and always very polite. Sometimes she bites.
Anyway!
This was supposed to be a post about furniture.
I didn't have all that much furniture in my last apartment, but in the spirit of minimalism and having fewer heavy things to carry whilst moving, I winnowed said furniture down to the following:
1. Futon and frame
2. Nightstand
3. Coffee table
4. Two folding shelves
5. Meditation bench
6. Two stools
7. Freestanding kitchen butcher-block structure
8. Fish tank stand
9. Three disassemble-able small shelves for shoes, etc.
10. Sturdy plastic storage container with drawers
Also (not furniture exactly but heavy, big, and/or fragile:
1. Full-length mirror
2. Two small lamps
3. One tall lamp
4. Toaster oven
Here are some things I learned about moving a) furniture, and b) things that are heavy, big, and/or fragile:
1. Take the lightbulbs out of your lamps.
2. Get a box designed to move art for your big mirror (or your art also), or really extensively/absurdly wrap the mirror in soft, comfy blankets.
3. TAKE PICTURES OF HOW THINGS GO TOGETHER BEFORE YOU TAKE THEM APART.
4. Put all the screws and washers in a bag together for each piece of furniture and label them.
5. Do not let cords dangle and trip you while you are carrying a corded appliance.
6. If you are moving something with drawers without emptying said drawers, tape the drawers shut.
Happy packing! Hopefully you will lose your screwdriver, hammer and scissors fewer times than I did.
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