the 'a' and the 's' are next to each other:

Alacrity: "I'm glad [our electronic medical record system] has a spellcheck. Sending home discharge instructions with 'thrombocytopenis' in them would have been somewhat sub-optimal."

Oncologist: "Oh yeah...don't worry about that. You know how many times I've typed 'neutropenis'? Many times."

urine is important:

ECC resident: "You're flashing it? STAB ITS BLADDER."

ECC resident, on insulin:

"Pancreases are fairly rapid creatures."

rounds wisdom from an ER staff doctor:

"You can't rehydrate a peppercorn!"

pericardial tap instructions:

Alacrity:  "Hey, [ECC resident], would you be able to help me tap this dog's pericardial fluid please? I've never done it before."

ECC resident: "Sure. Do you know where you're going to stick your needle?"

Alacrity: "Nope."

ECC resident: "Take the elbow. Bend it. There."